Its a very good morning, when I can get up and drink coffee or tea out of a handmade mug instead of a tin travel container.
When I can check in on my laptop, and research whatever comes to me, and read, uninterrupted. When I can eat a triple chocolate brownie for breakfast.
Its funny how I don’t ever plan or anticipate it, or even think of this as something I desire, yet, I think mornings like this are one of the greatest pleasures of my life. It seems selfish already, now that I have named it. And the conflict in the head begins!
I’ve discovered Adam Phillips, and his book “On Balance”…..and I felt this quote was rather poetic and relates to my usual issues . I think about my friends who can’t sleep, and the times when all I want to do is sleep. In an almost unrelated leap, I think of Kiki Smith, who mentioned as a side note in an interview that she wanted to more actively portray (in her art work) desire and longing. Because,
so do I.
“If we took SLEEP as our preferred picture of an object of desire,
began to see desiring as more like desiring sleep,
we would be doing things differently.
We would, for example, see satisfaction as
something we had to relinquish ourselves for,
and we would relish anticipation and longing.
we would never think that
reporting back was possible
or the point.”